I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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