walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
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