my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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