if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
