glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
We need to get me chipped asap
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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