I'm drive I can fine osifer
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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