God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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