You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Randomize