I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
