I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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