Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
why didn't you poke me back
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
