trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Randomize
