dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
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She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
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in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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