I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Randomize
