I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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