I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Randomize
