haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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