She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
