if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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