whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
