You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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