i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
