My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
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