I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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