she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
