He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Randomize
