And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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