Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
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I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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