Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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