I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
just tell him i said nine months
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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