okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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