The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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