Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
it hurts more in the daytime
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize