Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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