youre lurking in front of me
are you so shy because you have an std?
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
