when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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