Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
If i come over, it means nothing
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
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Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
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