It's like God shit irony all over that family
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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