WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize