I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
