so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
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