You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
