Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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