We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
