Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
