i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
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