you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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