We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
