I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
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