why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
