ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
